Brahma Dung Ananda

Dear Swami Dung,

Hi! my name is Norman.

This last weekend I met one of your students, Starman, at the La Jolla Psychic Fair... My booth was selling a software package to ward off evil thoughts and nonphysical beings from infecting computers. Starman’s booth was right next to mine. He said that you were the most Enlightened Being in the Universe and that your wisdom was matched only by your humility. I read your brochure and learned about your advice column.

So here is my question: After all the hullabaloo and global fear concerning Y2K… What happened? It was a total bust. How could so many people be so wrong? I am really confused.

Norman in La Jolla

Dear Norman,

It pains me to start out my very first message as a Swami as a correction, but I simply cannot allow you to address me as Swami Dung.

Proper Etiquette demands that you address me as Swami Brahma Dung Ananda.

It would really be cool if you included what Starman said about me in your greetings. You know... Something like...

"Dear Swami Brahma Dung Ananda, the most Enlightened being in the Universe and whose wisdom is matched only by his humility..."

Something like that.

Now that we have addressed that, I, Swami Brahma Dung Ananda, seerer of seerers and wisest of the all sentient beings will answer your question.

Actually all of the fear and concern and even panic concerning Y2K was true! Our world and civilization came close to a total wipeout. All of this would have happened if I had not interceded.

Yes, it was I who saved everyone's bacon. I interceded and used my powerful siddha powers to overcome this menace on a global basis. I realize that other religious and Spiritual teachers will claim to have been the ones responsible for this world-wide miracle but let me assure you that it was I and I alone that miraculously updated almost every computer of the planet. I did this in all humility and grace.

Brahma Dung Ananda has spoken!