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Message |
| Posted By: |
UT |
| Date: |
20-Aug-2005-14:42:26 |
| Subject: |
Telling Stories Around The Campfire |
A few days ago someone on this board suggested that what I do here is "remind us of what a fine life he is having." I've been thinking about this. It provided me with an interesting cubic centimeter of chance. Thanks.
To some extent it is true. I'm one lucky motherfucker. Some days, my life amazes even me. I just can't figure it out. It doesn't make any sense. I'm a total fuckup. What is it that makes my life seem to work out in consistently cool ways —- despite the fact that I'm a total fuckup, coexistent with me being a fuckup? And why do I feel compelled to write about it from time to time?
Rama once said, "Writers write because they're trying to figure things out." That's me. I plead guilty. There are days when the amazing run of luck that is my life just fuckin' gets in my face and demands to be written about, in a futile attempt to figure it all out.
I've never figured it all out. I don't expect to, or even hope to any more. The writing is what it is -— rants ranted in cafés, often fueled by inordinate amounts of coffee and sugar. Some of the rants turn out to just be rants, and others turn into real Uncle Tantra stories, because I delude myself at the time into thinking that these particular rants come a little closer to figuring it all out. Later I figure out that I didn't really have it all figured out. Go figure.
Today was such a day. I sat at a café and thought about the mindboggling turn my life has taken in the last few days and I found myself writing an Uncle Tantra story about it.
Enjoy. Or not. It's not to brag about my fine life. Really. It's to remind myself, by writing it all down, that my life is really happening this way, and that it really is a fine life. And to remind others that if a major fuckup like me can have the uncommonly fine life that Rama promised and *still* be a fuckup, they can too.
I always enjoyed the evenings in Rama's seminars when he had us stand up and tell our cool, inspiring stories or talk about our highest moments. The particular subject might have been success in the world of career, or what we had seen and felt on the last desert trip, or whatever. But the scene was always the same -— one by one we'd stand up and take the microphone and tell our stories.
And the stories were 'way cool. They always inspired the hell outa me. These were among the rare times in my study with Rama when I got to hear the experiences of my fellow students, the cool moments they had found along the Way. It was like when we got handed the microphone we got transformed into bards, telling a tale of power around the campfire, hoping to share that power and that realization with others. It always worked for me. I always left those meetings inspired by the other students' adventures, and reinspired to have new adventures of my own. This is just one of those microphone stories, first draft.
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