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Message |
| Posted By: |
Uncle Tantra |
| Date: |
6-Nov-2007-15:33:52 |
| Subject: |
The Aphorisms Of Unc, volume 1 |
Presented just for a laugh, in response to a bevy
of posts on another forum presenting aphorisms from
The Laws Of Manu and the Vedas like "The way to keep
your energy high is to have a lot of slaves and marry
12-year-old girls" and "Looking at your own excrement
lowers your state of attention." The concept of having
one's state of attention lowered by gazing at a toilet
trout had me LOL, and inspired me to write a few of my
own "Laws Of The Universe."
1. The more concerned seekers are with shielding
themselves from people, animals, places and things
that drain their energy or "personal power," the
less likely it is that they have any of it to drain.
2. The more that seekers refer to their path or
spiritual technique or tradition as "the best" or
"the highest," the less likely it is that they've
ever tried another one.
3. The more that seekers argue for the "rightness"
or "correctness" or "truth" of their path's dogma,
the less likely it is that the dogma is any of those
things, or that it has any worth.
4. The more convinced the seeker is of his present
state of consciousness, the less likely it is that
he is correct. Unless his assessment of his state
of consciousness is that he is in CC (Cluelessness
Consciousness), in which case he may be onto something.
5. The more a seeker demands to be taken seriously,
the less likely it is that he will be.
6. The higher a seeker considers himself on the
evolutionary ladder, the more likely it is that he
just hasn't looked up in a while.
7. The more "beneath him" a seeker considers other
people, the more likely he is to tred on them and
use them as stepping stones to climb higher.
8. The more a seeker claims to be "moral," the more
likely he is to be a closet megalomaniac.
9. The more reverence the seeker has for the words
of scriptures and teachers of the past, the less
reverence he is likely to have for the words of
people around him in the present.
10. The more compelled the seeker is to "defend"
his beliefs and his path, the more worried he is that
they aren't true and that he's wasted his life
following them.
11. The more that a seeker feels compelled to change
others and "make them better," the less likely it is
that any of his advice, if followed, *would* make
the others "better."
12. The more that seekers laugh at the attempts of
others to "make them better," the more likely it is
that they're doing just fine, and have no need to
be "better."
13. In general, the more a seeker laughs, the more
likely it is that he's on the right path. Conversely,
the more a seeker is serious and demands to be taken
seriously, the more likely it is that he's lost his way.
14. Repetition is the mother of anal retention. That is,
the more often the seeker uses a particular derogatory
term to describe others, the more likely it is that he
is really describing himself.
15. If a seeker has gone more than a couple of months
without expressing an original thought (that is, one
that he didn't read somewhere or have told to him by
his teacher or his tradition or some other "expert"),
chances are he has lost the ability to have an original
thought, and may never have one again.
16. The more a seeker claims to know what God "wants,"
the more likely it is that he has mistaken himself for
God and what he wants for what God wants.
17. If a seeker doesn't like to be around animals or
children, chances are the animals and children don't like
to be around him, and he's trying to hide that fact by
avoiding them.
18. If a seeker on a spiritual chat board has gone more
than a couple of months without describing an event in
his personal life that was ecstatic and wonderful and
full of light, chances are that there really haven't
*been* any of those moments in his life during that
period.
19. The more important a seeker considers himself in
the cosmic scheme of things, the less likely it is that
the cosmos would even notice he was gone if he died.
20. The more spiritual aphorisms you read instead of
coming up with your own, the stupider you become. :-)
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