I was dreaming that I was having trouble sleeping. I got up and left my bedroom and went down the hall. I walked into another bedroom and "Rama" was in the bed sleeping. I told "Rama" I was having trouble falling asleep. He told me to get into bed with him and that I would fall asleep easily. Totally trusting of "Rama," I got into the bed with him and immediately started to drift off to sleep. Suddenly, "Rama" rolls over and tells me that I am a very beautiful woman. I didn't know how to respond, but I was generally use to comments of that nature from men, and I knew "Rama" liked attractive young women. But then I felt like something wasn't right. Was "Rama" coming on to me??! I knew that "Rama" sometimes dated his women students, and maybe some of his women students would be into it, but I really couldn't see my teacher in *that* way. I really was very uncomfortable, but I would have done anything he told me, even this. All of a sudden "Rama" was on top of me, and I was feeling pretty traumatized, thinking how could "Rama" do this to me.

All of a sudden everything went away and I was in this very dark, black place. I intuitively knew that my energy was very low and that I was actually dying in my sleep and might not wake up. Suddenly, I felt this tremendous blast of energy rush through by being. I was very high and totally blissed out. I found myself mumbling Rama's name. Then I sunk back into a relatively low state, but not as low as I has been. I kept getting these blasts of energy and then sinking back into lower states, but never as low as the previous time. Finally, I was back to my "normal" state after I don't know how long. When I woke up, I was so messed up and traumatized I could not got to computer school. But that was when I realized what had really happended.

An Imposter Rama had nearly killed me, and the real Rama literally saved my life. At the time, I was a very new student of Rama's and was constantly being terrorized by Imposter Rama's in my dreams on a regualr basis. They or it were always trying to undermine my faith in Rama. At the time, I did not have enough personal power to distinguish between "Real" Rama and "Imposter" Rama. This would never happen now as I can easily distinguish at my present level of awareness. However, at the time, I never knew what was really going on until I woke up, and then I would be so mad at myself for being fooled over and over again. But when "Real" Rama saved me from "Imposter" Rama, I realized that not only did Rama literally save my life, but in actually doing so, he was also letting me know that he would never hurt me.

Deborah

 

 

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